Episode #010 - January 12, 2003

Sex in History

Take a look at this picture. Can you guess what these items have in common?

Don't try this at home! Well, all of these items were removed from anal canals in hospital Emergency Rooms. In fact, removing items from people's butts is an all too common procedure that emergency room staff have to waste their time on. The patient is inevitably male and the excuse is always that they accidentally "fell" on it - nudge, nudge, wink, wink. Here are some of the items men fell on:

  • Pop bottles
  • Flashlights
  • Spatulas
  • Lightbulbs
  • Candles
  • Cucumbers
  • Carrots
  • Apples
  • Toothbrushes
  • Baseball bats
  • Cans of motor oil (Hey, that's not what I had in mind when I talked about lube!)

Can you guess the number one item that men get stuck in their butts? Broom handles. And I doubt they were helping with the cleaning. This list and plenty of other wacky stories are in our book, "Nocturnal Admissions", which is available in bookstores or on line. It's guaranteed to make you laugh.

Hot Stuff Sex Toy

Micro Vibro Keychain When it comes to vibrators, I am always telling you that bigger is not better. If you can accept the fact that the top 2/3 of the vagina has no nerve endings, like none, but the bottom one-third is loaded with nerve endings, and the clitoris is where the action is. OKAY, so why are they making these huge honkin vibrators that rotate at different speeds? They are bulky, expensive and hard on batteries. Now, I know some women like a big vibrator, but I say "Keep it simple stupid"….this little Micro Vibro Keychain is discrete and powerful and it is cute and silent. That is my idea of a vibrator. Now, it is no secret that I am CHEAP, and this fills the bill. Mine cost $24.95 AND that included 6 small batteries. Hey, it don't get better than that. MICRO VIBRO lights a fire in my cheap heart with 3 hot briquets.

Sue's Mini Review

People who are very religious or who accept the Bible as gospel will have real difficulty reading THE X-RATED BIBLE, An Irreverent Survey of Sex in the Scriptures, written by Ben E. Akerley, published by Feral House. The author is a professor at the University of Southern California where he lectures on the Judeo Christian anti-sexual ethic and plays organ on Sunday. It is a good humorous, light read and interesting to boot.