Episode #148 - May 20, 2007

Hot Stuff Sex Toy

When we first started this show, we used to do a regular feature called SEX IN HISTORY, and one of the dumbest things we ever encountered was a FILTER QUEEN VIBRATOR. This was a vibrator from the 1960's that plugged into a vacuum cleaner hose. Ridiculous idea. Well, guess what? History repeats itself.

Vortex Vibrations This gizmo is called VORTEX VIBRATIONS, and it is actually two separate plastic attachments that go on the end of a vacuum cleaner hose. One is called The Introducer for more suction and less vibration, and the other is called The Seducer, with the opposite properties. It would be nice if they labeled them, but that is the least of their problems.

According to the manufacturer, the suction created by this device causes the clitoris to vibrate in spectacular ways resulting in explosive orgasms. Well, believe it or not, we found a tester to try VORTEX VIBRATIONS, and I will quote her report:

β€œThe suction was a great sensation on my clitoris and did as the instructions promised, increased clitoral sensitivity. However I did not have the faster, better, longer, orgasm that was promised, which I think may have been directly related to my disdain for its connection to my vacuum.”

And that is THE major problem with this toy. Who in their right mind wants to listen to a vacuum cleaner blasting away while they are trying to get their rocks off? That's about as romantic as masturbating on a runway at the airport. Gimme a break.

Then there is the cost. We usually don't give the price, but $60 for 4 pieces of plastic is just too over-the-top to ignore.

So, bottom line – VORTEX VIBRATIONS delivers more or less as promised. It does vibrate the clitoris in a unique and pleasurable way. Plus they offer a money-back guarantee, a real rarity for a sex toy and they get points for that. But having a vacuum cleaner howling away at the bedside is just as stupid now as it was in 1965. On the HOT STUFF HIBACHI OF LOVE, we are giving this toy one dust-free briquet.

Hot Stuff Extra!

OV Watch If you're trying to get pregnant, here's a nifty product – the OV WATCH. This fertility predictor is worn on the wrist and measures salt content on the skin, which helps to predict ovulation. The FDA-tested watch displays fertile and non-fertile days, so no more guessing.

cover Sue's Mini Review

This is not a bad book although it is not rocket science, DEAL BREAKERS: WHEN TO WORK ON A RELATIONSHIP AND WHEN TO WALK AWAY by Dr. Bethany Marshall. Her advice is good on setting your personal boundaries and sticking to them. You know that I go on the KISS theory - the minute your antennae and your unresolved anger start to simmer, get out fast. If it is bad now, it ain't gonna get any better.

Sunday Night Poll Results

Do you schedule a regular night for sex?

YES - 8%

NO - 77%


(Final tallies include West Coast votes.)