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My boyfriend ejaculates without orgasm????
Posted by L. on May 01, 2008 at 06:29:22:
Hello my partener of almost 2 years now recently started talking about our lack of sex. There have been a few factors latley with my (female) health issues but our discussion brougt about a very important matter that I was semi unaware of.
About 6mnths ago, he started mentioning how he couldnt feel me when we had sex, that it takes him so long to ejaculate and when he finally does he doesnt reach orgasm. we left the matter go and continued to go about having sex maybe once a week-month.
I recently had a scare with HPV and possible cancer so had undergone surgery and many examinations which led to a me being scared to have sex because to pain issues so i left the other issue alone.
Just last night I thought we had amazing sex but when we were finished he just got up had a cigarette and didnt say anything we started discussing the issue at hand.
For me I am able to feel him it even hurts a little when he gets inside me but for him he says its like an empty room hes in and he cant feel the walls. and when he ends up ejaculating theres no orgasm at all. He told me he loves me and doesnt care about sex but i dont think thats very rational, sex and sexuality are very important and I dont know what to do, he just says somethings you cant change. He also thinks he penis is to small which is a bunch of crapola.
I dont know how to fix and address this problem. I ask him what arouses him and he says only I do which is sweet but he aparantly has no sexual fantasy and the only thing he might like is anal sex which im ... well it hurts and i dont like it. so no. Ive read about "anhedonia" but hes got a very sex drive but he just doesnt orgasm?
Id do anything to get our sex life up again. Please help me Ive noticed on your site I cant find info on anhedonia and I dont know who else to ask. were living in Greece otherwise id call your show which I had done a few years ago and you really helped me out.
I hope to hear from you and have a lovely day.
Webmaster Reply:
I see by your signature that you are a health professional and probably have far better access to this sort of information than I do. I had never heard of anhedonia until your note. Apparently it's an inability to derive pleasure from things that are normally pleasurable. In terms of sexual performance, there's apparently medication for it, so he should talk with his doctor. As you probably know, the functions of ejaculation and orgasm are two separate functions in males - we can have one without the other, although they often occur together. A higher level of arousal is required for the orgasm to happen, and that seems to be his problem in this case. Anyway, he should see his doctor.Randy