Before we explore the topic of pornography, let's explore the differences in male and females sexual fantasies.
Males are visual, they are turned on by pictures to trigger a fantasy. This explains the popularity of “skin “magazines, porn videos and porn on the internet. Women on the other hand are generally aroused by reading about romantic escapades or love stories. This may explain the popularity of Harlequin Romance, especially the newer erotic books. There is some Erotic porn that some women find stimulating. It will feature romance, wooing, courtship, the thrill of the chase. Some women do enjoy hard core men's porn, but most do not become aroused by pictures of naked females involved in vigorous intercourse on the hood of his car. Many women also feel that their body cannot compare to “DEBBIE DOING DALLAS' so they feel inadequate. Other women believe that their partner is not turned on by them, he wants some female with big hair and bigger boobs.
Many women are quite upset when they find their partner's stash of magazines and videos, and they throw them out. Unfortunately, this does not work, he will just find a better hiding place.
I hear from women that their partner will watch porn, masturbate, then not be interested in a sexual relationship. They believe he is addicted to porn.
This can be devastating to a relationship and there is no easy answer. I would strongly recommend relationship counseling so they are both aware of their partner's feelings and needs. Then perhaps there can be a compromise found that is satisfactory to both.